Pittsburgh Is Popufur

At last count, I believe that Pittsburgh was on just about every list known to man. I don’t know what it is, but Pittsburgh is becoming a very popular city. Maybe it always was. Maybe, I’ve just been blind to how well liked Pittsburgh is outside the confines of the tri-state area. Maybe, we need to tone it down a bit. I’m afraid of my favorite burgh becoming a snob.

Let’s see. We topped "America’s Most Livable Cities List" on Forbes and The Economist. We’ve ranked 12 on the “Fun Cities” list. We were rated one of the best cities to work in during a recession. I mean there isn’t a “Best City for…” list that we haven’t probably been on in the last four years. Hell, we even hosted the G-20 last year which was relatively tame compared to the issues that Toronto is having this year. Yeah, we had some incidents downtown and in Oakland but I’d call the Super Bowl and Stanley Cup celebrations more cause for riot gear than the G-20 protests. Yeah, we burn couches when we win a national championship.

However, for the last five years, Pittsburgh has been host to another event which is cause for a double take downtown. Anthrocon. That’s right, the furry convention holds court in downtown Pittsburgh every year. If you don’t know what a furry is, then you probably don’t want to know. Put it this way, a furry is someone who failed at attaining that lifelong goal of being a mascot. Now, I don’t want to get into a leg lifting match with people over the case of whether or not this is all too weird. People dressing up in animal costumes is simply a lifestyle and my biggest issue is why people would want to dress up in huge fur covered costumes with large heads and walk around downtown Pittsburgh in late June or July. I’m sure the inside of those costumes are about as pleasantly smelling as the Pirates road standings, at this point.

“But, Mongo, they request litter boxes in their hotel rooms.” Sure, that is a bit different, but quite frankly, I’ve been in my house waiting patiently to use the bathroom and thought about my cats’ litter box once or twice as my back teeth started floating.

“But, Mongo, these people are sexual deviants who are into weird sex.” And you aren’t? Ok, that was a bit unfair. I don’t know what your habits are and unless you have documented proof that every single person that dresses up like a unicorn mixed with a lion mixed with a luck dragon and carries a sword is a sexual deviant then you need to explain to me how you know it to be true. I’d love to hear that story.

The fact that the furries love Pittsburgh doesn’t surprise me. In fact, if I woke up tomorrow my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be any more surprised. The one thing that does surprise me is that they didn’t ask the ex-pierogi to be master of ceremonies or at least reached out in a show solidarity and attended a Pirate game to boo the team. Unfortunately, not only would their booing be drowned out by the booing that should be going on at a Pirate game, they were playing out of town.

So, furries love Pittsburgh and I guess Pittsburgh is sure to be on the top list of Cities who love Furries. I can only imagine that we are one step closer to being chose for a future Olympic Games site. But that might just bankrupt the city so let’s stay off that list.