Sampsonia Street Samurais

Google Street View can be useful for a lot of things. If you want to know where the entrance to a parking garage is, or how close a parking spot is from where you need to be, it’s invaluable.

Then, there’s the sheer joy of just looking at the city without having to get real close. You can travel down the streets looking at the architecture from the comfort of your living room. After all, Pittsburgh has been given so many accolades over the past few years, it’d be a shame to not take in all that splendor. And this way, you don’t have to get involved in road rage incidents with jagoffs that make Pittsburgh lefts.

However, you have to wonder if Google does a lot of quality control in their selection of filming. Maybe they just turn the camera on and go. Perhaps they do a few passes to make sure that they don’t have anything inappropriate in the shots or a bug on the lens effing it all up for five blocks.

Sometimes, I think that the folks at Google have to have a sense of humor. Because otherwise, why would you let this be a part of your Street View scenic landscape?

Sampsonia St. Samurais

In addition to all the accolades Pittsburgh has received, I think we need to get an award for Most Samurai Friendly city.   Now, this, of course, is slightly less as prestigious than when South Union won the, “Best Place For a Ninjas to Break in Cars” award.   But, it’s almost on par with Scottdale when it won, “Best City to Abandon Your Kids For Ninja Practice”. 

Now, my brother emailed me this picture, so he gets credit for bringing it to my attention.  But, it didn’t stop there.  Why would it?   You never know what’s around the next corner.  So, my brother sent me the link to this street corner.

Now, at first glance you might say…. “Oh, look, a whale tail!”   

But, more importantly, WTF is in the alley?

Here's a better view from the opposite direction.

It looks like a half assed Matryoshka doll or homemade Gloop costume for Comic Con.  For you kids out there, Gloop is from a cartoon called The Herculoids. 

Still, I have no idea what the hell that thing is. It’s got feet, so somebody is standing under whatever that is. And that guy, with the apron, must work at Doug’s Market and he’s unfazed by all this. Maybe he saw the samurai fight in the distance and didn’t notice the thing next to him in the alley.

So, if you’ve got time to kill, wander around Google Street view in your town and see what you can see. 





The Colonel Has Run Out Of Chicken

I think I talked about the trials and tribulations of going to the local KFC in Irwin, PA. Oh, that’s right. I was supposed to and didn’t. I opted to stroll down memory lane, instead. Well, let me give you the basics. The KFC in Irwin sucks! How do I know? Every time I go there they screw up the order or flat out don’t have what I want.

On an evening back in June I went in to pick up dinner for my family and sat there, waiting, for a half hour while they made more chicken. Apparently, they don’t understand that the F and the C in their name stands for Fried Chicken… as in they sell it. This is more of an atrocity than the time that Smokey Bones ran out of chicken because they sell other things but when the actual name of the store contains the word chicken in it, you would expect them to actually have some to sell. But no, I had to wait until they made more. Then, they actually shorted me two pieces.

This was the second time I had an issue. Earlier in the year, they had this confusing circle of fail concerning how to actually order a meal. The ability to actually choose which type of chicken I wanted (leg, thigh, wing, etc.) became a point of contention and they ended up screwing up the division of parts.

Then, this last weekend, my father-in-law got a hankering for some KFC and we decided to go get a 16 piece bucket meal with a coupon he had. It was 16 pieces, however we sliced it, two large sides and eight biscuits. Plenty of food to feed four of us and have some leftovers for lunch the next day. So, I walked in and asked for the bucket and said, “Can I pick which pieces I want?”

They said, “Sure. It usually comes with four of each type, but if you want to substitute breasts for the others, there is an up-charge.”

“Not a problem. I just wanted to know if I could do four wings, four thighs, and then eight drumsticks of extra crispy.”

“Um, we don’t have enough drumsticks.”

Now, normally, most people would not really care. However, usually, my wife only likes the drumsticks and I prefer them if I can get them. Because I was on the third go around with these people, I had a bit of an attitude.

“You mean you are out of chicken? OK, well, how about six drumsticks and you offset the difference with a couple of breasts at no extra charge?”

“Yeah, we don’t have enough of either. Now, you can do four extra crispy and four original drumsticks.”

“Look, I’m just the messenger. I was told to get extra crispy. I’ll need to make a quick call. Can I please have back my coupon that you just crumpled up?”

So, I went outside and called my wife. “What’s wrong this time?” See, she already knew this was a bad idea and I hadn’t even spoken yet.

“They’re out of chicken.”

“What do you mean they’re out of chicken? This is like the time Smokey Bones ran out of…”

“I know! Look, will you be OK with some original recipe drumsticks?”

“Yeah, fine.”

So, I went back in and gave her the coupon and told her I’d take four of each recipe of drumsticks and I was on my way.

This all still begs the question, “How does Kentucky Fried Chicken run out of chicken?!?!”

‘Eff it. I’m going to Popeye’s.