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Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Ode to YouTube. How do I love thee, let me count the ways.

In my realm of real world, not cyberspace mind you, I work in an office. It is an unassuming building perched on a hill top above a busy intersection. We are a simple people, making our way the only way we know how, by avoiding work as much as possible. Until about a year ago, we had access to all manner of distraction the internet had to offer, iTunes, Streaming Satellite Radio, eBay, facebook, myspace, and of course YouTube. Oh, how we'd wile away the hours watching badgers in a loop, listening to our favorite Howard Stern bit, flipping over to Will Ferrell getting cursed out by a two year old, all while sniping each other's bids for the last Prada bag or bootleg copy of the Star Wars Holiday Special. Damn you, wookielove5! Next time, next time.

Now with our IT group finally getting on board with traffic shaping and blocking sites, we have lost all access to myspace and YouTube. With other sites soon to be on the way, we have to think of creative ways to get our daily fix of wasting time. I had moved on to writing up articles to be posted into a non existent blog. The equivalent to a tree falling in the forest. One day, I happened to be on a much needed coffee run and saw something spectacular, a coworker was watching something on YouTube. But, but, YouTube was deemed blocked by Websense. How is it possible that this fellow cube dweller was able to see the elusive monster from Cloverfield? I asked him and me made pinky swear not to tell anyone. He gave me an IP siteURL that hadn't been picked up by our IT people. I quickly ran back to my desk, secured my headphones in the appropriate jack...you must check this, otherwise you could be embarrassed...and let the magic happen.

Suddenly, relief came in waves of Robot Chicken bits and music videos forgotten by time. I was able to peruse all the videos people had been emailing me for months. I finally found out who Chris Crocker was and figured out how to connect all the people on LOST through one easy video. My life was given meaning, again. No longer did I have to toil away on senseless excel sheets or answer ridiculous meeting requests regarding my job performance to date. The internet was finally given back to me and all was right with the world again. Like riding a bike, my fingers quickly keyed Alt+Tab like a seasoned pro when folks wandered by my cube throwing a glaring eye at my screen. People begun to notice a spring to my step, a gleam in my eye, and a reduced need for a cup of Double Folgers' Regular coffee from the kitchen. Alas, there were some adverse side effects. My regular trips to coworker's cubes to keep up on Survivor and Big Brother slipped to biweekly status. The once, long standing meeting at the coffee pot with my friends was met with my absence. I don't know what ever happened to those folks. Perhaps they found a new job and have gone on to bigger and better things. Maybe, I'll find a bypass for MySpace and see them once again. Maybe, just maybe.

But for now, I have to check out this kid stacking cups. I hear it's unbelievable.

Quick list of favorite my YouTube clips.

Where the hell is Matt?
The Vader Sessions (caution, profanity)
Vader being a smartass
Numa Numa
No explanation needed

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