WUMF: July 2012 Edition

Summer just be flying by.  I didn't realize it was time for another WUMF.

Olympics 2012
I’ve been waiting to watch the Olympics for awhile now, but since the games are not being shown on Qubo or Nick Jr. the odds of me actually watching much of them are slim to none. I did manage to get my kid interested in the diving and gymnastics events only because they were flashy. Once they went back to showing just the races, she tuned out and asked for her show. I sort of almost decided against the entire thing after catching a few minutes of the God awful opening ceremonies. That trip through history to return an iPhone was pretty awful.

Other than that, the Internet is doing a great job of covering the games. All of the results are coming in WAAAAY before NBC gets off their asses and airs the actual event. Waiting for NBC to show you the swimming competition is like working in IT and waiting to see Dark Knight Rises after the crowds die down a bit. You’re expecting your geek coworkers to not spoil it for you the minute after it comes out.

Does NBC understand that with Twitter and Facebook and oh, I don’t know Google and every other news site, that the results will be announced as they happen at the games and not during prime time when you choose to air the events? Maybe this is just proof at how vapid of a culture we’ve become, expecting the rest of the world to wait for us to show up… much like Michael Phelps at the pool. All that Subway made him slow.

Actually, I’ve got this vibe of treating this like it’s a reality show house competition. It seems very unpatriotic… or maybe uber-patriotic… like the bad kind of patriotism.

Ladies and gentlemen, the Beetles!
When we moved into our house in 2004, we were told by the exterminator who was doing work for the previous owners as part of the contract that we have a lot of bugs. Not in the house, but on the property. With two big oaks, two big maples, and a shit load of pines, there are plenty of reasons why there are lots of spiders, ants, and termites. Now, we’ve got beetles.

I had just cut the grass and we were relaxing in our patio chairs. I could distinctly smell the all too familiar scent of cat shit from our neighbor strays and it was pissing me off as usual. As my daughter wandered around playing and looking at bugs, she told me to come check out these strange, HUGE bugs. Sure enough, there was these gigantic beetles crawling in and around a pile of cat shit. Three to five of them were just frantically crawling out from under a pile of dirt and grass and poop. I walked throughout the yard and noticed another set of beetles doing the same thing. Apparently, I was lucky enough to not have stepped in either pile during my cutting of the grass.

We checked the Internet to try and find out what kind of beetles these were but no such luck. They are either dung beetles or hister beetles from what we could narrow down.

I went back out after dark with the camera but could find no trace of them.  I even looked again this evening and no trace of them. 

Squirrel Hill Tunnel Traffic
They have been working on the Squirrel Hill Tunnels for what seems like years.  This past weekend they closed down from Friday through to Monday at 5:00AM to do more work.  Traffic was still backed up at 6:30AM this morning as we were backing up to the Churchill exit.  I thought they had gone late or there was an accident.  No such thing.

Do you know what was backing traffic up so badly, this morning?  Hundreds of commuters didn't expect to see half of the roof missing on the inside of the tunnel and had to slow down to inspect it REEEALLLL close. 

Now, you may think I'm exaggerating, but for the 600 yards the roof had been ripped up above us, traffic slowed to a crawl.  However, when we reached the end of where the work had been done, everybody took off like a shot.  Literally no traffic exiting the tunnel.  It's like, "Is it going to fall on me? What the hell is that curved thing up there?"

I was inspired to parody a meme that has been done to death, but it's been selling pretty good in my online stores.

Keep Calm and Maintain Speed Thru Tunnels

I even got a shout out on Twitter from PittGirl

Best "Keep Calm and ...." shirt ever? Yes. #pittsburgh #tunnels skreened.com/mongoware/keep…
— Virginia Montanez (@JanePitt) July 30, 2012

I love this town and the people in it.  Just... not... the ones staring up at the roof of the tunnels instead of actually driving.

Drive on, Pittsburgh

PAXBurgh: Pittsburgh, Make It So!

See, I’m thinking here. I’m thinking how to make things awesomer…? More awesome-y? whatever. Suck it, haters.

Anyway, a friend of mine is going to PAX in Boston this year and I thought, “How cool would it be if Pittsburgh hosted it?”

First of all, it has to be better than getting Anthrocon. I’m sure guest services at the Wyndham would rather hear, “I need ample room for my XBoxes” instead of “I need ample room for my litter boxes.”

Second of all, think of the tie ins you could have. We have the biggest Pinball museum just west of the city. Another perfect tie in, Mario Lemieux. He’s called “Super Mario” after all. And…. We could use his TV outside the Consol for streaming of games. Also, why not have the Pittsburgh Cultural Trust book PLAY! A Video Game Symphony for the same week just after or before the convention as to not cripple the downtown area or take away from either. They’ve done it here before.

Pittsburgh is lacking a viable gaming scene yet we are a burgeoning film location. With Batman, One Shot, and countless other films being done in the area we have our own film studio in 31st Street Studios. Why not leverage them for motion capture work on video games. Fallout 3 had an addon that was set in Pittsburgh. The highly anticipated Story of Us takes place in Pittsburgh. It’s time. You could tie in a live Angry Birds demonstration sponsored by The Carnegie Science Center with launching Penguins at what’s left of the Civic Arena. Set up a Mario Kart tourney in Schenley Park ala Pittsburgh Gran Prix. Blue Shell takes you out at Phipps, right into the Columbus statue.  Bazinga!

With The Art Institute and CMU in the area there should be enough of a video game demographic to warrant this from both the designer and player side. We’re bent on being the best at everything on every list. Why not go full tilt Technophile Video Game Geek? We pull this off and we’re not just telling Portland to suck. We’re telling Seattle to suck it. [Credit goes to That’s Church for that phrase.]

Now, Pittsburgh make it so. PAXBurgh! I’m available for a planning job. Just promise me a nominal pay and all access to the event.

PAXBurgh. Come on! It’s there for the taking, like a shiny coin sprung from a question mark block.