Sitting In Judgment Over Domestic Violence and The Media

I admit it.  I have played that card before.  Back in 2009 and 2011, I put Chris Brown on my D-Bag of the year awards list.  I judged him in the whole Rhianna thing because I was a spectator to a TMZ/CNN/E/Social Media deluge of opinion and edited content to garner ratings.   And now, even though my posting has become lax and two months gone, I am not going to bring up the current issue except to say this.

We need to stop sitting in judgment of the celebrity.  We need to stop sitting in judgment of the victims.  We need to address the issue.

The issue is this.  Domestic Violence is a thing.  Abuse is a thing.   And instead of going after the perpetrators and victims we need to tackle the issue.  Taking to Twitter, Facebook, and yes… blogs, to call out someone for hitting another person or for someone staying with someone who hit them does not help the matter.  All it does is create a cycle of pressure and tension for those involved leading to more stress.  Now, I say that in a PC way because I am trying to be objective.   In short… So and so does not need you defending or bashing them on Social Media.  You aren’t taking away the act.  You are creating a perpetual cycle of Ground Hog Day in that person’s life.  That’s not to say the abuser doesn’t deserve the criticism or constant reminder of their crime, but the victim doesn’t either.

Here is a short list of points.  And of course, I make a generalized disclaimer because I am not an expert or in law enforcement.

1. STOP calling attention to the people involved.
   Whether it is Ray Rice or Janay Palmer or Rhianna or Chris Brown, using their names to push your social media agenda is not a call to attention to end domestic abuse or a shaming tactic.  It just creates more sensation and publicity and keeps the wrong people in the spot light.  If you must… hashtag the crime.  Or, better yet, don’t hashtag.  Don’t Tweet.  Don’t Retweet.  I know, I posted to Facebook about how the “availability” of a certain tape becoming known led to the suspension and that had it not, the release of the player would not have happened.  I was more about calling out the NFL’s “too little, too late actions”.  Still, it was probably wrong to do so.
    
2. STOP assuming.
   We saw an incident.  ONE.  One time.  We have no idea what was said in that argument.  I am neither condoning nor judging the persons involved.  That one single event should be enough to have charges and an investigation brought about.  And both were arrested at the time.   It’s also up to authorities and those with the knowledge and training to conduct it.  Not bloggers, talking heads, or Monday morning experts to decide.  “Well, her response clearly comes from someone who has a history of being abused.”  We don’t know that.   There could be extenuating circumstances that led to that incident and she could be just as capable for provoking or causing an incident as much as being in an abusive relationship.  We just don’t know.
   
   What we do know is that from the tape, an altercation happened outside of the elevator where the victim attempted to strike the accused.   Then, once inside the elevator, we saw it escalate and that he knocked her out.    We don’t know what was said.  We don’t know what happened before they came into view of the security cam.  That doesn’t mean it isn’t the case.  Everything on that tape, that the 24 hour news media looped endlessly and unrelenting in search of ratings, is pretty much how it was described by him.   We all knew what happened.  We just don’t know why.  ABC’s “What Would You Do” ran a segment where they showed a couple in an argument that was framed to look like abuse.  They filmed it from two perspectives.  One was a man clearly strong arming and demeaning a woman.  The other was from the point of the woman being the aggressor.  Most people look at men as the bigger, stronger person and it was almost humorous to see him getting chewed out by a woman.  “Aww, look at the pussy.”  That’s just an opinion of what some onlooker might have thought.   But we don’t know what happens in a relationship because we aren’t privy to the stuff that happens off camera, out of frame, or behind closed doors.   After all, people reacted to what they thought was an altercation between a couple.  In reality, it was two actors playing out a scene for reaction.
   
   The media often clips, edits, and crafts a story to scintillate.  Make the accuser look worse.  Make the victim look less blameless.  Make the police… ALL THE POLICE IN ALL THE COUNTRY look like power abusive trigger happy assholes.  Look at the recent case in Ferguson.  Only the act was shown, not the before.  People were quick to judge based on what they assumed happened.   “Large African American man suspected of robbing a store.”   When it wasn’t the store owner that called the police, it was a spectator, assuming that’s what happened.  Assumptions truly do harm.   Unless you have all the facts, you can only work with the conditions present and the current act as it happens.  Speculating on whether or not someone standing beside their abuser is in denial or just stupid doesn’t help the issue.  It perpetuates the cycle of gossip and sensationalism that gets people hurt further.
    
3. STOP blaming.
   “She’s stupid for marrying him.”  “How could she stay with him?”  All of that does nothing but show how ignorant you are of what it is truly like to be in an abusive relationship.   Again, in reference to Chris Brown and Rhianna , I did it, too.  I said it.  I learned.    People… and I say people because both men AND women are perpetrators of abuse as well as victims are capable of abusing another and should not.  And it doesn’t always have to be physical abuse.  Someone can verbally or emotionally abuse you and it’s just as wrong.  They may abuse you into thinking that you leaving them is a horrible idea, because “you will never do better” or “you are not good enough to be with someone else”.  “No one, but me, would have you.”  “You’re just a drama queen and want attention.”  This is problem.  People in abusive relationships don’t always have an exit strategy.  For some, religion plays a role in their trying to divorce.  Church elders may say that the good Christian thing to do is to work it out.  Not blaming the church or religion, but there is still a long way to go in this world before we understand the nature of people vs. the infallibility of faith.  Sometimes, you just need to leave.   The best thing the church, a family member, or an administrative group could do is get you the proper help instead of offering hollow advice from a place of ignorance. 
   
   Point is the victim isn’t stupid.  The victim is most likely scared.  There are a million things going on.  “If I leave, they will find me.  Instead of one punch, it’ll be five.”  Worse yet, there may be a child involved.  People who abuse aren’t just strong or physical.  They can be smart.  They can paranoid.  They may go to great lengths to make sure you don’t have an exit strategy.   Sometimes, because of the level of abuse, they may isolate you from the tools and knowledge that can allow you to understand how to fight back.  It’s not being stupid, it’s being controlled.  It’s being brainwashed.  It’s being forced to live a life of submission where you don’t always understand that it is wrong to be treated like that.  They can make you think you deserve it.
   
   
4. STOP talking about the wrong people.
   Am I disgusted with the NFL for getting caught with their pants down?  Yes.  Am I going to stop watching football because of it?  No.  Why?  Because even though there is probably a statistical correlation between violence in sports, pressure to perform, abuse of mood altering performance enhancing drugs, concussions, brain injury, and violence outside of the workplace due to trauma and behavioral issues from all the above, one incident does not make the sport all bad.
   
   Do I want Roger Goodell gone?  Sure, for my own reasons.  Unfortunately, he has most likely made the NFL more profitable than any other commissioner.  He is very good at his job, first and foremost, as a generator of profit and revenue.  Does he display poor judgment in character issues and dealing with problems? Maybe.  But he isn’t going anywhere.
   
   Do the Ravens suck?  What do you think?  I am from Pittsburgh  :)  
   
   Again, we talk about the wrong people.   We shouldn’t be talking about people or corporations at all, let alone one that generated some $6 billion+ in revenue, but they are non-profit.  Go figure. 
    
5. START talking with your loved ones, children, etc. about what’s right and wrong.
   We should be talking about abuse and domestic violence and violence against women AND MEN.  How woman and men can perpetuate violence against each other.  How it is never right to hit anyone for any reason unless you are in danger, yourself.  Defense, never offense.  Also, teaching our children the value of their own life as well as others.  How they aren’t to blame for abuse.  How they are special and worthy and how they should be treated AND HOW THEY SHOULD TREAT OTHERS.   The only way you can stop the cycle is to keep it from happening.  Let it bred out in future generations.  For every policy or rule that the NFL puts into place to weed out the bad element, there are how many bad elements just going someone else.  Their zero tolerance just means zero problems they have to deal with.  If not them, it’ll be the arena league or CFL or whatever.  Saying, “Not in our house”, doesn’t stop the abuse, it just shifts it somewhere else.  We need to be the ones to not tolerate it in our own lives.  It’s not the job of the NFL to keep abuse from happening, it’s ours.  As a parent, as a teacher, as a mentor, as a parent, and even a child, it is up to us to decide.  No more.

National Domestic Violence Hotline
1-800-799-SAFE (1-800-799-7223)
TTY: (800) 787-­3244
http://www.thehotline.org/

Links from The Administration for Children and Families
at The Dept of Health and Human Services

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/blog/category/domestic-violence

Kickstart My Art

As an entrepreneur, and I guess I use that term way too much but it works for me, I’ve spent countless hours entertaining tens of people with content.   (That wasn’t a misprint, literally tens of people have enjoyed my work.)   But, as much as I’m in it for the joy of creating and sharing my work with others, I’m in it to make money, too.  This blog, my shirts, and videos are aimed at having fun with media and design but also serve to make money for the purpose of proving that I can make money doing these things.  Now, I have my 9-5 job and that’s fine.   It affords me to be able to indulge in these other ventures to the point where I don’t have to work hard at producing content and that has probably been a detriment to my profit margin.  I guess it depends on what your definition of success is.

But, as a shirt designer, blogger, and YouTuber, I’ve found that I’ve had to reinvest a substantial amount of my profits back into the business to try and expand.    Granted, it’s all spent on games and gadgets, but that’s not that point.   I’ve made it this far without having to rely on the kindness of strangers to just hand over money.   Yes, strangers do hand over money, but there is an immediate transaction of money for goods.   I’ve never just asked blindly for funds and there’s a couple of reasons why.

The Risk

I’m not a huge risk taker when it comes to the business side of M.A.M.S.  I’ve operated under the guise that if I cannot make a profit from what I am doing, I won’t do it.  That was the model I’ve followed for paying $50-$60 a year for a premium CafePress Shop, pretty much a necessity if you want to make any real money without social media traction of your own.  If and when I stop making a profit above that overhead, I will quit it.  There are other non-paying sites that can do just as much if not more in terms of products, but CafePress holds the majority of the marketplace among Print On Demand sites.

Even YouTube isn’t that risky of a proposition, even though I’ve made all of $2.00 from videos I’ve produced since January.   The reason being is that I am doing basically what I would do anyway, I’m just filming and producing it.   I’d still play the games.  I’d still need the hard drive space.  So, I’m not too worried about that.     Still, I would probably get more views and more traction if I spent more on my work, but I don’t have the capacity to do it that way.   This is one of the things I can’t stand about businesses, especially ones I’ve worked for in the past.   They see this all encompassing need to spread themselves into so many categories that they can’t manage their base.  Soon, quality across all platforms suffer because they are more concerned with profits and market share that they don’t see that for every new customer they gain for one shiny piece of crap, they lose three loyal ones who bought their goods when it was quality stuff.

The Results

Here’s the meat and potatoes of my post, Kickstarter.   Now, don’t get me wrong, I have friends that have used Kickstarter to fund their projects and I give them all the credit in the world.  Me, I just don’t see me spending effort and making promises I may not be able to keep in the long run.   With Kickstarter or other crowd funding platforms you ask for the money on the promise that if you get funded you can then give some sort of return on their investment.   Usually, it’s in the form of a copy of whatever you’re trying to get funded but sometimes you promise more for higher amounts of pledges.   Because I would simply be funding the promise of producing more of the same content with better infrastructure, I can only offer what I already do, now.  So, why would I try to entice people to give me money to do what I already do, now.   I would just be creating the sales, proactively.   Hey, that’s actually not a bad idea.   A Kickstarter project that simply aims to sell what you already sell, a “PRE-SALE” if you will.

The Negative

Still, Kickstarter is a great way to use social media to get the word out on your venture.  What I don’t like is how it’s become a tool for people who shouldn’t need to use it.  Case in point,  Zach Braff recently held a Kickstarter project to fund a film he was trying to make, called Wish I Was Here.  It’s not that I don’t like Zach Braff, I just don’t see the need for someone who is worth $22 million dollars to hijack a platform that is primarily for those without the funds themselves to produce a movie.  Yes, the budget is set around $6 million dollars, nearly a quarter of Braff’s net worth, but it’s not like Braff is an unknown filmmaker or actor.   And the cast has some talent in it.  Why not secure producers in your own backyard.  

Also, don’t get me started on Spike Lee using Kickstarter.   The director is trying to raise $1.25 million, of which he’s $700k into for a film.   The dude is worth $40 million.    I also can’t stand that he’s remaking Old Boy, but that’s another story.   George Lucas built an Empire with his own money.  He was smart.  Granted, he went back to the well one too many times and ruined it, but that’s beside the point.   Kevin Smith maxed out credit cards to make Clerks and that worked out fine.   I guess that’s the “Risk” thing I’m talking about.   However, using Kickstarter, you’re not risking your own money.  If it doesn’t get funded, it doesn’t get funded and all that money goes back to the people who have pledged.   If you’re unlucky, you may have a diva or two that will be pissed that they put other projects on hold, with the promise that your project would get funded, and then proceed to sue you for lost wages.   I’m sure that kind of insurance gets baked into the contract.

I just don’t think that celebrities should be using Kickstarter to fund things that upstart filmmakers and artists rely on to produce their work.   It’s trendy and hip to be a project, I get that, but you are making millions of dollars a year.  You’re neither hip nor trendy.  You’re rich.   You’re also diluting the waters of what was considered a great place for people to collaborate.    

It’s like when you find a great little restaurant or bar that no one goes to.   You walk in and own the place.  After awhile, your drinks and appetizers are already ordered before you sit down.  We had a place like this in college.   It was quiet and laid back with no hint of jocks or drunken frat asshats.  Then word got out and the place got noticed.  Granted, due to various infractions by other establishments that forced them to close, our quiet little tavern became the only port in the storm on campus.  I went back about ten years after college and the place reeked of cheap beer and Axe cologne.   Christmas lights and lattice work destroyed the ornate mahogany walls and there were crappy bands and DJs spinning Jock Jams 13.   It was a mess.   It was ruined.  That’s what Kickstarter will become.     It will be the house in Beetlejuice that gets renovated after the Maitland’s have died and the Deetzes have moved into it.

So, while I applaud my friends that have used Kickstarter to their credit, I hate to think how it will look in three to five years when Justin Bieber starts a project to fund his new tour, Douchebag 2016. 

2011 D-Bag Awards: Celebrities

The celebrity category. Sometimes when you’re famous for something you forget that the door swings both ways. Just ask Mel Gibson. And whether you wreck your expensive car or spout off against police while they arrest you for DUI, it doesn’t matter how big you may be, because the fall is just as meteoric and hurts a hell of a lot more when you hit the Earth.

In this bracket, few late entries did not make it into the mix like Alec Baldwin, who got booted off of a flight for playing Words With Friends on his mobile device, when he was clearly asked not to. Now, is it possible that mobile devices do not interfere with airplane electronics? Sure. After all, they were on the ground when the incident occurred, so the likelihood that the plane would explode because Alec played the word, ‘Incendiary’ is minimal. However, the flight crew asked you to stop and you didn’t. You are no more special than my schmuck ass back in coach with the crying babies. Get over it, you rude little pig. Frankly, I was a bit pissed at American Airlines for halting Alec because I was just about to beat his ass with the word, ‘entitled’.

Also, missing the cut was Ashton Kutcher, who managed to miss a spot after putting on a stellar display of d-baggery this fall. He made comments on Twitter about the Jerry Sandusky scandal, nailed the wrong chick or at least did it without Demi involved, and he’s pretty much tanking Two and a Half Men into the sea below the balcony on Charlie Sheen’s old place. However, we only had space for more and they are just as douchey as Kelso and Donaghy .


Chris Brown – Didn’t hit Rihanna this year, but a GMA dressing room window seeks a PFA.
Chris made a name for him in music, but his stupidity has made him more infamous. So infamous that when asked about the whole restraining order situation with Rihanna he became violent and trashed his dressing room after his auto-tune heavy performance of ‘Yeah 3x’. He threw a chair at a window then stormed out shirtless. Then he tweeted up a firestorm about praising Charlie Sheen while bashing him. Well, in the case of bashing him, GMA simply brought up a preapproved topic, by Brown. And as far as Charlie Sheen… we’ll get to that.

Let’s face it, Chris. You’re an angry man. Even if you release a new album, the two year old domestic abuse stuff will follow you around. We like to see how you handle stuff, that’s why we ask you about it. We want to gauge your response and see if you’ll freak out again. Oops. We we’re right. Get over yourself d-bag. You hit a woman. You endured being a exposed to your mom’s abuse by her boyfriend. You learned nothing. Try again in 2012.

Charlie Sheen – Vatican Assassin From Mars Powered By Winning Tiger Blood.
Charlie Sheen was never the A List star Tom Cruise is. Sure, he had some great movies. But for every Platoon or Wall Street, there were five The Arrival or Terminal Velocity films. However, he found success on the small screen taking over for Michael J. Fox on Spin City and then turned his outrageous life into a goldmine of material on Two and a Half Men. So, what went wrong in 2011 that lands him on our list?

Well, after entering rehab for the third time in 12 months, the production of the show had to be shut down. Then, CBS cancelled the remaining episodes of the season after Sheen made derogatory remarks about show creator. He fired back demanding a 50% raise on the already highest paid salary in television because he felt underpaid compared to what the show was pulling in as far as revenue. CBS then fired him putting the show’s future in limbo. He then went on tour and became a viral sensation thanks to a few choice interviews as people gawked and wondered, “Is he high or is he a genius?”

A little of column A and a little of column B. First off, if Sheen is completely sober through all of this then he’s nuts. You don’t bite the hand that feeds you… see Robert Downey Jr. Yeah, RDJ pissed me off for being a bit of a douche when he wouldn’t talk to Jimmy Kimmel’s crew after Iron Man exploded his star power, but he has been smart about his reacceptance into Hollywood. Sheen just reloaded and went 'Hobo with a Shotgun' on them.

It also didn’t help that he was shacked up with two pornstars, sorry, his goddesses, and had his kids run around in that environment. Although, his ex was just as bad of a role model for the kids. He might have made enough from his tour to live comfortably for awhile and seeing Ashton Kutcher tank Two and Half Men in his place shows that in the battle over his ability to be replaced, he’s ‘Winning’ but he’s still a d-bag for screwing all this up in the first place. And that is the torpedo of truth, armed and ready.

Lindsay Lohan – From Disney to Lockup to Centerfold
Should anyone be surprised at how Lindsay Lohan turned out? She took the Disney path to stardom, turned in a few performances of note as an adult and then bottomed out in a bottle. She’s been to rehab, jail, India, jail, rehab, jail… and was she in jail? Oh yeah, that’s right, every time she’s gone to jail, she’s been back out because she’s a non-violent offender. Well, so what?

In February, she stole a necklace, but served house arrest. Then, she failed a random drug test but no additional punishment was given. She screwed up again and had her probation revoked. She ended being sentenced to 30 days in jail of which she spent 5 hours. So, clearly there is no reason to think she’ll stay on the straight and narrow, because every time she gets put in jail, she’s back out.

So, she’s on the list because she continually mocks the justice system and gets rewarded for it. She also ruined what most men would call an excellent chance to finally see all the goods. She’s in Playboy and from the cover photo, she looks bad. She hasn’t looked good in a long time, but the effects of her lifestyle has taken its toll.

Brett Ratner – Heisting is for f**s
He’s a bit brash and a pompous jerk. Not just when he’s playing himself on Entourage, mind you. But he managed to screw up what could have been a great Oscar telecast by going on Howard Stern and saying that ‘Rehearsal is for f**s.” That won’t win you any points in Hollywood.

Really, what he said is no more than what teens say out on the playground and if you take that too seriously, you need to grow a thicker skin. Yet, he did do a stupid thing and for that he’s a d-bag. He had a chance to make the Oscars bearable after the ridiculous James Franco debacle this past year. He screwed the pooch on that. Thankfully, Billy Crystal came out of hosting retirement to save the day.

And the winner is…

Chris Brown

He just doesn’t get it. He should talk about the Rihanna thing. He should talk about so much that he hurts from the experience, because in the end, you cannot ignore the actions just because you release another album. You are an auto tuned d-bag.

2010 D-Bag Awards Round Two: D-Bag Celebs

For our second round we have the cream of the A – D List of celebrity d-bags. These people, who we seem to want to live vicariously through with everything from TMZ stories to Twitter feeds, have taken great pride in being exemplary at the art of being a d-bag.

Mel Gibson
Another repeat offender. A few years ago, Mel went on a bender and was pulled over in Malibu. He went off on a anti-Semitic / misogynistic rant with the arresting officers. He apologized, sought treatment, divorced, and had a baby with Oksana Grigorieva, a Russian pianist and recording artist, mostly phone messages. Then the real fun began. The Gibson Sessions began coming out as a series of taped phone calls between Mel and Oksana. They should be on iTunes sometime next year. Quality stuff like the instant soulful classic, “You Make Me Want To Smoke.” It may rival Alec Baldwin’s funkadelic, “You’re a Rude Little Pig” from a few years ago in terms of downloads. Still, Mel found time to play with his Beaver in The Beaver and even pal Jodie Foster came to his defense. In all this, you know a comeback was just waiting to happen. Then Mel got dropped from The Hangover 2 and well, that just made it all worse.

You Make Me Want To Smoke
by Mongo Angry! Mongo Smash!

Miley Cyrus
The tween sensation cum bong smoking young adult has had a pretty trying year. Prior to turning 18, Perez Hilton decided to post and mark up pictures of her on tour causing his own d-baggery and possible criminal charges. Then she finds out her Mom went from being all achy breaky with her Dad to doing the Unskinny Bop with Bret Michaels, who she sang with on Good Morning America in June. After that, she turned 18 and went downhill. It’s almost as if she looked at her life and then looked at Lindsay Lohan and said, “Yeah, that’s what I want to be like.” Think of it this way. Both were Disney kids. Both had/have a singing career. Both have had risqué photo shoots. (Possibly even nude photos of Cyrus have surfaced, though it’s undetermined if it’s her or when they were taken.) And now, booth have been found out to be doing drugs. Ok, you can say that smoking Salvia isn’t exactly illegal, but when you see a video of her hitting the bong and then making less sense than the Yip Yips from Sesame Street it’s not pretty. Why is she a d-bag? She may be 18 and may be an adult and quite frankly, she's old enough to do what she wants, but her fan base is still under age and impressionable. Not every Hannah Montana fan turned 18 when she did. You can blame the celebrity and media all you want but then I say to you, “Not one of those Harry Potter kids got busted for anything.” Although, Harry Potter did show off his Whomping Willow on stage in Equus.  In the end, Miley needs to either lay off the junk or at least stop getting filmed doing questionable things.

Achy Breaky Bong

Lindsay Lohan
Where do you begin? Rehab, Jail, Rehab, Drugs, Funny or Die. By the way, Lindsay, Funny or Die is the name of the website, not your choices for what to do with your career. There’s not much you can say that hasn’t already been said by everyone else.  Although, the biggest moment of d-baggery was the fingernail scrawled with FU in the courtroom. Who was that for? Take your punishment, get clean, write a book, make a comeback and fall off the wagon again.   You're still young.   Really, it is time to take stock and get your life back on track before you derail even more. The bottom never looked so good, right?

Is that a Lee Press on Nail?

Paris Hilton
Apart from being a no talent ass clown, she’s a horrible flyer. In July she was detained and released after being caught at an airport holding marijuana. Then, in August, she tried to use her Jedi Mind tricks on authorities by telling them that the cocaine in her purse was gum. Then she tried her best Austin Powers impression, “It’s not my bag, baby?” Finally, she admitted and was given probation. Then, she traveled to Japan and was denied entry because of the strict drug laws. Other sites on her Asian promotion tour are even stricter than Japan. If she’s not careful, she’ll be in a new reality show called, “The Brokedown Palace Life” Frankly, I blame the justice system. It’s obvious that giving her probation does nothing. Lock her ass up for a year.

"That's pot. I mean, no it isn't."

John Mayer
“That’s enough John Mayer” was sprayed on a brick wall by Chris Griffin of the Family Guy. Apparently, he didn’t get the hint. I’ll give him this, he’s a great artist. But he’s a terrible date. The appearance on Ellen, just before the New Year, was downright ridiculous. His Twitter Battles with Perez Hilton are like two T-Rexes engaging in a slap fest. It just doesn’t really make for compelling pugilism. He basically is the Kanye West of the media world and Kanye West takes offense at that. The dude just needs to stop and take a step back. I understand, no junk no soul but let’s get a little perspective. You’d never see John Lee Hooker getting into a Twitter fight with Dick Cavett.

Is that a Cosby Sweater?

And the winner is?

I’ll say this was a close race. I had a hard time figuring out who was the bigger d-bag and honestly, it’s almost a shame to just give the award to someone in order to not have a tie. Still, on the whole, the biggest d-bag has got to be…

Mel Gibson

Are you recording this?

Whether or not Oksana shares some of the blame for why Mel is Mad is debatable. We’ve really only heard his side…through ranting over the phone, which makes him look like a total train wreck.  However, this is not a one shot deal.  This is a pattern of behavior that should really not be as unexpected as one might think.  Mel’s over the top behavior is almost a parody of some of his more “out there” characters.  He’s gone Martin Riggs by way of Jerry from Conspiracy Theory. If anyone doubted that his career was in the crapper, after the DUI arrest, his fit has really hit the shan.   I think he may be a threat to himself, at this point.  But then again, even Roman Polanski won Oscars after being accused of rape. As far as the others go, Lindsay is almost on her way out and Miley may just be going through some growing pains. John Mayer could be a nominee next year and that would probably make him a shoe in. Paris? I don’t want to give her any awards for anything. Let’s just hope she goes away.

2010 D-Bag Awards Round One: Jock D-Bags

First up are the playmakers and d-baggers of the sports world. We’ve got infidelity, drunken antics, pictures of winkies being texted, team changers, and a power tripping commissioner.


Tiger Woods
His biggest act of dickery came in 2009. He had cheated on his wife, Elin Nordgren and completely destroyed his persona of this elite golfer with a genial appeal. 2010 kicked off with the discovery of many different women Tiger had given the long ball to. Making matters worse, Tiger had a subpar year in golf, missing the cut at the Masters and various low placing spots in the other Majors events. There was also the creepy, egotistical ad campaign from Nike involving a video which featured narration by his Dad, the late Earl Woods. Did he learn anything? Probably not. It will be some time before Tiger returns to form. Of course, if he were to retire tomorrow, he’d still be able to live lavishly.

 

Tiger Woods Commercial Narrated By His Late Father

Ben Roethlisberger
Ben can look back at 2009, from a professional standpoint and be proud. His personal stats were phenomenal, breaking franchise records left and right. Even though the Steelers failed to make the playoffs, Ben’s performance rating was great, overall. However, off the field his antics in a Georgia bar landed him in the hot seat which kicked off 2010 with an investigation into possible sex assault charges, which were dropped due to lack of evidence, and a four game suspension, which was upheld due to lack of common sense by the NFL and fellow nominee Roger Goodell. But Ben has made good on his suspension, completing whatever steps he needed to earn his way back into the good graces of the league. Even if there are chants of “No means no!” in the event that Ben plays in his third Super Bowl appearance in February, you cannot argue that Ben is a tough as nails player, shrugging off a broken foot, broken nose, a inexperienced and struggling offensive line, and the constant evil eyes he gets from those who feel he was guilty of a crime in order to continually win games for his team. You have to wonder if maybe he’s playing at this level and through the adversity in order to redeem himself in the eyes of his team and his fans. Odds are, if he hoists a Lombardi trophy in Dallas, this coming February, he’s probably going to be given a pass. I won’t say that I, personally, have not forgiven him for his attitude off the field but, I’m just glad he got rid of that stupid haircut. He may still be a lifelong d-bag and only the off season will tell.

Big Ben Story on WTAE

LeBron James
James played in Cleveland for seven years without bringing home a championship. In July, he became a free agent and began being courted by other teams in the NBA. His biggest dick move came from holding a televised special announcing his decision to leave Cleveland for Miami. Now, free agency is what it is. I am not bothered by the fact that LeBron left Cleveland. I am bothered by the fact that he informed his employers just minutes before the LIVE telecast and wasted all of America’s time with such a piece of self-inflated egotistical douchebaggery.

LeBron Interview and Decision

Brett Favre
When it comes time for Brett Favre to be inducted into the Football Hall of Fame, no one will deny his deserving of being there, not even me. However, the fact that he should have retired um, 1000 times already makes him the number one sports douchebag in my book, alone. How many times will he make the world wait to see if he’ll decide to leave the farm and go to camp? How many backup quarterbacks will join teams hoping for a legitimate shot of starting, only to have Brett say, “Hmm, should I retire? Hmmm, naaaaahhh!” Then again, how many times are we going to have to use bleach on our minds to scrub away the image of Little Brett being texted to Jen Sterger? The QB supposedly sent inappropriate texts, including one of his Mini Viking to Sterger in 2008, along with voice mails. He admitted to the voice mails but denied he was the one who sent the texts. Whether he acted on all those bad intentions he had, this much is for sure. The lack of disciplinary action against Favre for these acts just makes Roger Goodell look more and more like the king of all d-bags.

 

Pants on the Ground Foreshadowing?

Derek Jeter
Love them or hate them, the Yankees are an elite ball club. They play to win, even if they have to cheat to do it. Back in September, a pitch bounced off the end of Jeter’s bat and Jeter pretended to be hit. He even had the trainer look at his arm in an effort to sell his injury. Taking his base gave the Yankees a chance to score, helping their race to the playoffs. While Instant Replay isn’t used in baseball in this fashion, repeated viewings of the clip, clearly shows the bat being hit and Jeter admitted as much, later. So, is what he did cheating or just part of the game? Yeah, his job is to get on base and help his team win games, but what does that say to all the impressionable young fans and players he has become a role model to? Win at all costs and don’t get caught. Bud Selig should take a page out of Goodell’s book and start fining players for poor sportsmanship. Then again, the Yankees would probably get preferential treatment like certain Hair Club For Men Members QB’ing up North.

 

Jeter Cheeter

And The Winner – LeBron James
LeBron may not have cheated in basketball, assaulted anyone, sent inappropriate pictures of himself or cheated on his wife, like the others, but his actions involving his decision to leave Cleveland were ridiculous. The town is not the greatest, I get that. But they welcomed you in 2003 and cheered you on, buying merchandise with your number and likeness. In turn, just because you didn’t get that brass ring, you decided that their devotion was second or third rate and jumped ship to a better team. And you did for the publicity. You went on live television and indirectly declared that your decision to go to Miami should more important and newsworthy than a war in Afghanistan, a environmental disaster in the Gulf of Mexico, a natural disaster in Haiti, and any number of issues this country has faced coming out of the recession. Kudos LeBron, you are the biggest D-Bag of this round.





Honorable mention time
I wanted to limit the category to five nominees but had to at least mention Steve Johnson of the Buffalo Bills because he blamed God for him dropping a game winning catch against the Steelers. And to top it all off, he did it over Twitter. Granted, the continual praising and thanking of God for anyone’s abilities to make millions of dollars to play a sport has become so blasé that it demeans a higher power and comes off as inauthentic. However, blasted said higher power and the fact that you did it over a social network like Twitter just makes you look like a complete ass.

2010 D-Bag Awards: Nominations

Just in case any of you really enjoyed last year’s D-Bag Of the Year Awards, I am going to hold another Awards post, devoted to the dickery for this past year.  I have decided that I will not use the same format as last year, simply for the sake of sanity and time. This will be a straightforward posting with no elaborate scenarios. I will simply deliver each round with a brief summary of what each one did and the winner.  Those winners will go up against last year's winner, Death, in a sudden death cage match with ill tempered squirrels.

The Nominees for 2010 are:
D-Bag Jocks
Tiger Woods (2nd year Nominee)
Ben Roethlisberger
LeBron James
Brett Favre
Derek Jeter
Steve Johnson

D-Bag Celebs
Mel Gibson
Lindsay Lohan
Paris Hilton
John Mayer
Justin Bieber

Reality D-Bags
The Cast of The Jersey Shore
Heidi Montag (2nd year Nominee)
Jesse James
Teen Mom cast members

Political D-Bags
Christine O’Donnell
Sarah Palin (2nd year Nominee)
Bill O’Reilly
Glenn Beck
Tea Party Movement

Company D-Bags
Dell
Comcast
BP
MTV
The TSA

Media D-Bags
Julian Assange
Perez Hilton
ME (Mongo)
Dr. Laura Schlessinger

CED:  Chief Executive D-Bags
Roger Goodell
Bob Nutting
Steve Jobs

RIP Mongo

Shhh! I’m thinking.

What? Oh, that title…no, nothing bad has happened, not yet. I was just thinking about my inevitable death. Someday, I shall be no more and my four readers will finally get their lives back, minus a few years of inane blog posts they’ve sorted through here at M.A.M.S. I just figured it would be interesting to plan out what my obituary would say. I know what it should say. But, perhaps we could take a look at what it could say. I was recently discussing the deaths of some famous people with family and friends and had decided that I did not want my obituary to read, “Died from anal cancer” like some of Farrah Fawcett’s online obituaries had read if I were to ever die from anything remotely connected to my ass or other parts used for disposal of waste. Now, a publicist for David Carradine said that the Kung Fu star died fighting ninjas, which I thought was far more appropriate than the dreaded Michael Hutchence’s syndrome. My good friend asked if there was ever an obituary that made it past the editors and contained various references to either false accomplishments or hysterical hyperbole. The winner might just be Michael Jackson when all is said and done, but I thought I’d give it a go.

Mongo died, today, at the age of 115. He was killed while fighting a zombie horde that had invaded his hometown. Mongo managed to dispatch several zombies, with only a crowbar, while simultaneously rescuing a family trapped in their poorly protected home. He was bitten on the arm by one of the undead and proceeded to detonate a propane tank killing him as well as the remaining attackers. This was considered the only outbreak of undead nature and the disaster has been averted thanks to the Supercentarian.

Mongo had accomplished quite a lot in his 115 years on this Earth. He was raised in the desert by his Uncle and Aunt on a moisture farm near the Jundland Wastes. His childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons, in the winter he was known to play in his most prized possession, an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle. A tragic gun accident cost him the life of a childhood friend and nearly his own eyesight forcing Mongo to never use another gun, relying only on his own ingenuity, a Swiss army knife, and what was available to him for escaping tight situations.

As he entered into high school Mongo had scored many milestones. Among his achievements, he successfully became a surgeon at the age of 14, though some dispute the age to be 16. An old computerized journal written by Mongo was discovered and converted into existing readable document format by MIT grad students and supported the claim of 14 years. He gave it up though to lead a normal life with his peers. He went back to high school to in order to graduate with his friends.

During his second high school career, he successfully helped his basketball team defeat their rival high school’s Dragons. In that same year it was discovered that a similar looking and possible relative, unconfirmed, played guitar at a high school dance in California, 30 years earlier, prompting speculation that Mongo had indeed gone back in time and performed a yet unreleased version of Johnny B. Goode. The principal of that school has declined comment, only recalling that he was a slacker.

During his senior year, it was rumored that Mongo became embroiled in an international incident between the Soviet Union and the United States military when he unknowingly hacked into the military’s supercomputer used to predict possible outcomes from nuclear war. He just wanted to play games. This incident has been denied by both the U.S. and Soviet Republic’s Government as something you could only find in a movie. One last highlight occurred in Mongo’s adolescence when he successfully skied the K-12 slope, beating the captain of his high school ski team, Roy Stalin.

After graduating he spent the summer as a caddy at Bushwood Country Club where he competed for a college scholarship against other Caddies. Winning the Caddy Day golf tournament proved him a worthy recipient but some unconfirmed discretion with a club cofounder’s niece forced his disqualification. Undeterred, he somehow obtained enough funds for his college career from local businessman, Al Czervik. As the summer wound down he spent a few weeks in Nantucket, single handedly winning the Nantucket Regatta with a makeshift boat and crew assembled from various locals and the engine of a sports car. Before entering college, he had another brush with luck as he was responsible for saving actress Brooke Shields from drowning. He was offered a large sum of money and subsequently blew it all hiring, musical group, Van Halen to play at his birthday. What money he had left was used to attend college.

Over the next few years, Mongo attended a variety of schools, earning him degrees in all manner of study. As an undergrad, he studied astronomy at Grand Lakes University and competed on the dive team. He performed a nearly impossible dive dubbed the Triple Lindy which earned him the only perfect 10 from judges. The dive has since been banned from collegiate diving due to its inherent danger. Afterwards, he transferred to Adams College where he successfully defeated the Alpha Beta fraternity employing a high tech laser light and sound show in the talent portion of the annual Greek Games. This victory led to his own fraternity's wresting of power, over the Greek Council, from the Alpha Betas and an end to nerd persecution at Adams.

Tapping into that associated brain power he felt within the Tri Lambda fraternity at Adams, he decided to leave and attend Pacific Tech to complete a physics degree and worked on a research team consisting of fellow students tasked with designing a chemical laser and tracking device for the military. No such device has ever been claimed to be in existence or contracted by the military and, as such, any information would be deemed classified. His final few years in college were spent in business school while he moonlighted as a hot shot bartender.

After graduating college a second time, Mongo entered into the world of business as a mail room clerk while secretly becoming a high powered executive simply by occupying an empty office. He kept the company from being acquired in a hostile takeover by influencing a number of high rollers in the business world to bank roll his bid to take over the Davenport Enterprises in a proxy fight for the Pemrose Corporation.

Not satisfied with big business or medicine as a career, Mongo moved into the realm of archaeology and retrieved several priceless artifacts such as the Cross of Coronado, the Lost Ark of the Covenant, and it is rumored that he found the stones of Sankara, and the Holy Grail, though evidence is there to support it. There was an additional report that Mongo found the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull but this was deemed too silly even for the most diehard fan of his exploits.

It has been rumored that Mongo is simply a pseudonym, an alter ego for various identities associated with Batman, Superman, James Bond, and even the most outrageous, that he is, indeed, Hannah Montana. As incredulous as it sounds, neither him nor Montana have been seen together at the same time. Further reports that he is the Lindbergh baby have been seen as either ridiculous or intriguing from various points of view.

Other identities connected to Mongo that have either been proven false or are undetermined have been:

Keyser Soze
Client # 8
He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named
Spartacus
Tyler Durden
Grand Priory of the Sion
Jason Bourne
General Maximus Decimus Meridius
and,
The guy in the creepy Burger King Costume

While none of these have ever been confirmed it is worth noting that no one has disputed these claims.

Mongo is survived by his wife and daughter as well as the rest of his extended family which include, Jan, Peter, Bobby, Greg, Marcia, Cindy, but not Oliver; Alex P., Mallory, Jennifer, but not Andrew; Fleegle, Bingo, Drooper, and Snorky; various Happy Tree Friends, Bucky T. Katt, Satchel Pooch, and Rob; Gordie LaChance, Chris Chambers, Teddy DuChamp, and Vern Tessio, even though he was the fat kid that grew up to marry Rebecca Romijn, the bastard; Stewie, Chris, Brian, Peter, Lois, and the other one; the fourth member of Destiny’s Child, Lisa Lopes’ right eye, Randall Flagg, The Dread Pirate Roberts, Ante Meridian, Uncle Meridian, and all the Little Meridians, The Noid, and various members of Menudo.

Guests will be received at The Brickyard citing that Chuck Norris’ beard could not hold his awesomeness, Circus Maximus could not be booked, and Michael Jackson’s memorial in the Staples Center was like seeing Quiet Riot at the County Fair. He will be interred at Machine City until a more suitable venue can be entered into the Pop Culture World for his eternal rest.

Hail to the King, baby.

I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Into Protective Custody

Ok, by now we know that Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson have died, but just a couple days later, pitchman and Western Pennsylvania native, Billy Mays, died in his sleep. Now, I don’t foresee Billy Mays taking the media spotlight away from Michael Jackson as if her were applying OxiClean to a stain, but his passing gives one pause. It’s been a bad week to be famous.

To say Billy Mays was a famous celebrity in comparison to Farrah or Michael is like saying that Britney Spears is as good a singer as Mariah Carey. But, as far as pitchmen for infomercials and other “As Seen On TV” products Billy was, as least, better than Taylor Swift. His in your face loud voice and perfectly manscaped beard was his trademark and he knew how to sell a product. From what has been publicized, Mays was on US Airways Flight 1241 when it had to make an emergency landing in Tampa. During the landing objects fell from the overheads striking Mays but he claimed to be fine. If this wasn't a strong case for some Mighty Putty, I don't know what is. Later, not feeling well, he went to bed and was found unresponsive the next morning. Apparently, we've learned nothing from Natasha Richardson.

But his death along with everybody else these past couple of weeks probably has everybody in News Media Outlets scrambling to put together a tribute video package just in case Patrick Swayze coughs. Hang in there Patrick, I’m really pulling for you.

Billy Mays is gone, yet Vince Shlomi is still getting injured on a regular basis with hookers and car wrecks. There is no justice.

Why not get your own SlapChop a Ho shirt today?


You can also Slap Your Troubles Away with this shirt.


Both designs are available
at Mongo Angry! Mongo Smash! The store.

Doing a little surfing of the web brought up a ton of celebrity dead pool sites and a bunch of “Filtered by Websense” pages, sure to have some IT guys wondering what I’m doing on my lunch. However, looking at a few pages in Wikipedia, which is more reliable than CNN and more fair and balanced than Fox News…it’s sarcasm people, go with me… I've come up with a short and incomplete list of famous people who shouldn’t be running with scissors anytime soon.

Phyllis Diller – 91
Carol Channing – 88
Andy Rooney – 90
Elizabeth Taylor – 77
Betty White 87
Abe Vigoda – 88… wait he’s dead… sorry, he’s still alive…. must check my sources again
Richard Dawson – 76 Oddly enough, I forgot he was alive and as Randy as ever.
Kim Jong-il – 67 He could soon have a run in with a very large metal object that explodes on impact…
If he does die, someone find me Yoko Ono and prove to me that they aren’t the same person
Fidel Casto – 82
Half of television’s fall lineup - leaving only Wife Swap and Donald Trump to irritate me.

Death of Childhood Pop Culture: Looking Back at Michael Jackson, Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett and more

This saddened installment marks my 200th post.

I was just getting ready to settle in for a couple hours of DVR space reclamation when I saw a status update on Facebook saying that “Michael Jackson was in cardiac arrest. Will probably die this evening.” I immediately stopped watching recorded television and went straight to live television. Thankfully my daughter was napping at the time or I would have been stuck watching Sprout instead of CNN, ABC, and other news outlets. Before the television could update his condition, Facebook had already declared him dead via TMZ. While everyone else had him hospitalized or in a coma, more status updates came out saying he was dead via other news sources. The news, while rather shocking, only served to bring to an end a fantastic life of a pop icon who first came to prominence during my early childhood years. Oh, and yeah, Farrah Fawcett died, too.

Well, that’s what it felt like yesterday. There was this switch in reporting, like a shift change at a factory or plant. Farrah had died in the morning and all the reporting was about her, then Michael died and it switched like a light. Soon the media machine went nuts and everything came to a screeching halt around the world with the death of an icon.

If ever there was a case of best evidence for “Death Comes in Threes,” this week was it. First Ed McMahon died, then Farrah Fawcett and MJ on the same day. Three of the biggest names from my childhood pop culture upbringing gone, all prominent spokespeople for products, all having a tumultuous era of their lives displayed in the media. Ed McMahon had lived a full life, dying at the age of 86, MJ and Farrah both died relatively young. Still, Hollywood deaths no matter how expected are still jarring to our senses.

The deaths of this Madison Avenue Three are not a summary of my childhood, but more of a coda, or perhaps a bridge in my life stretching between the first half of my life and heading into the second or middle portion of my life. Throughout the years there has been a systematic disintegration of pop culture land marks along the road of my life. Looking back makes you laugh, cry, and wonder, “Too soon or too late” for some.

For my parents, Elvis was probably the last celebrity death that marked their youth. I say that, not from the standpoint that nobody else died after 1977 but that everyone associated with their childhood during the baby boom generation was heading into their later years and death was an expectance, not a shock. They had already experienced the death of JFK, Marilyn Monroe, and Martin Luther King more than 10 years before that. Now into their 30s, my parents had probably pared away the last few layers of their childhood when Elvis died at 42. Also, consider that prominent icons from the media or pop culture that had existed in the mainstream at this time also carried into mine and my siblings’ lives. For example, George Burns, was a very prominent fixture in my parents’ lives as a radio and vaudeville star, but in my life he played God and was a comedian I’d see on television chomping a cigar and peering out of huge glasses. When he died in 1996 a very big piece of my childhood died.

Two years prior to Burns death at 100, the first huge gap formed in my childhood memory, John Candy. Now, one could argue that River Phoenix was the first, but spanning the entire three decades I can relate to these kinds of events, River had a brief run. He never really got a chance to expand into his full potential, much like James Dean, in my parents’ generation. No, for me, River Phoenix was a tremendous actor and person but his impact was not realized yet, so I have to go with John Candy. From an overall Pop Culture perspective, I think the Challenger Disaster ranks number one in my life, but from a pure Hollywood Entertainment standpoint, it’s Candy.

Growing up, I loved him in SCTV and films like The Blues Brothers, Vacation, and Stripes as well as Uncle Buck, The Great Outdoors, Home Alone, and Planes, Trains & Automobiles. I could go on and on about his career but it’s just a rehash of what has already been said about his enormous comedic presence. Another big media presence surrounding a celebrity’s death came in 1997. I was spending the day at a local amusement park just before the Labor Day holiday when I returned home to see my parents’ television fixated on CNN. There had been a car wreck in a Parisian tunnel which claimed the life of Princess Diana. A media frenzy surrounding the event and most likely helped to cause the accident was sprawled across television stations up and down the dial. I think this was the first huge impact the media had on a person’s death either in attributing to or reporting on it. Her marriage had become an iconic moment in television pop culture and so would her death.

Soon the flood gates opened and a slew of iconic actors, comedians, and other entertainers from my childhood followed suit. There was Alec Guinness, Charles Schultz, Walter Matthau, Jack Lemmon, Ray Walston, Frank Sinatra, Jason Robards, and many more. These deaths bridged the gap between my parents’ generation and my own. A true testament to their impact was this transition from one to the other.

That’s kind of how Michael Jackson’s legacy will be viewed, in some sense, a legacy of change. In his youth, he was an amazing talent and performer, even topping Diana Ross in her own show. As a young adult, he blazed a pop music trail selling more copies of a single album than anyone else in the world. On my birthday, this year, Thriller was certified 28x platinum by the RIAA. In the U.S. the Eagles still hold the distinction of having the Best Selling Album at 29 million copies sold of Their Greatest Hits album, but expect that to be shattered with the news of MJ’s death.

As Jackson rocketed further into stardom, his life became a media circus. The chimp, the bones, the catching on fire, the chamber, the ranch, and into the 90s came the allegations of him molesting a child at his home. Soon, the talent became overshadowed by the tarnish. Overseas, MJ was still a sensation, but in America, people began to get a sense of discomfort. Domestically, record sales suffered. His appearance changed much over his 50 years and that lead to even more head scratching. “How could someone so talented do all that to himself?” Allegations of abuse by his father, Joe, gave little explanation to his behavior and a disclosure of suffering from a disease called vitiligo and also lupus was documented as the cause of his lightened appearance. Still all this seemed a departure from the MJ from the last two decades.

Failed marriages, artificially inseminated children, dangling babies, and a new investigation following a documentary done by Martin Bashir plague the pop star’s career as he now heads to court over the allegations. Impromptu roof top dance numbers in cars, halting traffic, pajamas in the courtroom, and a not guilty verdict all bring the icon’s growing weirdness into the end of the new millennium’s first decade. Reports of financial troubles, lawsuits, and a new concert tour mark the last years of the star’s life as he is rushed to the hospital suffering a cardiac arrest at age 50 on June 25th, 2009.

That’s a very modest and condensed list of events in the life of Michael Jackson. As always, I never claim to be an expert on anything but I do offer a theory as to why MJ was the way he was. Total arrested development. I think that the impact of his father and fame on him led to Jackson displaying a psychological neoteny. The allegations of abuse during an interview with Oprah and on other biographical depictions of his family life on television suggest that maybe he just never grew up because something in him never evolved socially. He was a child star and that led to him staying that way, socially. Perhaps abuse from his father led to a child like state, fearing adult hood or fearing adults for that matter, reverting him to only trust and want to interact with children.

There is an old saying that Mother is the word for God on the lips of children. Even fathers are viewed as Godlike in the eyes of a child. Maybe this destruction of that notion of “Parents as God” prompted him to adopt the ideology that he sees the face of God in children. Further theorizing may suggest that perhaps the supposed abuse by his father led to his changes in appearance more so than any disease could. Rumors that Joe would constantly hold Michael’s nose closed to change the flattened appearance. Others speculate that plastic surgery was to erase the image of Joe Jackson in his son’s looks. Whatever the case, I believe his behavior can be attributed to his growing up in the spotlight and in that house. As far as the trigger for this transition. Maybe it was that first initial surgery to fix a broken nose at 19. Maybe it was the proliferation of his image everywhere that haunted MJ. Everywhere he looked he saw this face, his father’s face, and it made him feel ugly. With surgery and coloring he could attain or retain a childlike appearance different from his family and in a sense, timeless, like a doll’s face.

I also believe that he was mismanaged in a financial and PR sense on top of having a childlike disposition. Let’s put it this way, my two year old daughter will carry around a baby doll. She will dote on it and nurture it with a bottle. She will lay it down on the couch and cover it with a blanket. Then she’ll grab it by the arm and run down the hall, banging the doll’s head into walls, doors, and other objects. Is she a bad person? No, she doesn’t understand certain concepts and behaviors associated with parenting. I think MJ did not develop and understand these concepts fully, leading to the bizarre dangling of his child over a balcony and the even more bizarre relationships he had with children at his home, prompting the allegations of molestation. I don’t think MJ had an evil bone in his body or malicious intentions towards children. In fact, while it clinically could be called molestation, if there was any inappropriate contact with these children, I don’t he understood or conducted himself in such a way. He simply acted as a child would with other children. The fact that he was 45 at the time didn’t help his case.

Also, look at his behavior with financial matters. Go watch Tom Hanks in Big. Specifically look at the behavior of his character when he starts getting paid at his job. He goes out and buys a lot of toys, and novelty items like a Soda Vending Machine, to decorate his apartment. He even has a set of bunk beds. Now, take MJ and give someone with the personality and thought process of a child. I’d buy an amusement park, too. Go interview any child and ask them what they would do with a million dollars. The imagination is limitless and I think the understanding of how much a million dollars really is escaped MJ. His finances were such a complex layered system that I don’t think he knew how much he really had or at least understood it. He had too many ‘yes’ men around and not enough concern over his personal being. They may have guarded his celebrity, and their source of income, but I don’t think their intentions were to help Michael manage his life.

Now of course, this is all speculation on my part and like I said, I don’t claim any expertise but go back and look at his life and his work. It’s almost as if he off stage persona was the puppet and his on stage one was the master. Iit was a very polished and ferocious one. MJ as a performer and artist was light years more developed than his role as a human being off stage. Perhaps this is where he felt most comfortable and the switch went on in his brain that brought out the adult.

His life has been and will be looked at under a microscope for a long time. Regardless of what new information may come out in the wake of his death, you cannot argue that as a recording artist and performer, he was a talented individual and hopefully that image will stay with people instead of the ones we are all familiar with now. Yes, the jokes will come about the manner of death, “How can you perform CPR on a person with no nose?” It’s inevitable and also sickening in a sense. 23 years ago, when the Space Shuttle Challenger exploded after takeoff there was a slew of jokes done in poor taste over the disaster and teacher / astronaut, Christa Maculiffe.

Michael Jackson is the Elvis of our generation and while people see a dead fat white guy on a toilet, many more people see an icon that defines a portion of their childhood. Hopefully, that will be enough to thrill us for years to come.